If I get the chance to control something …. I would choose…

My foot size is the thing I wish to control…yes my foot size….I know it may look so silly to think in this way…but I really face a problem because of my foot size.

Growing up, my foot size was larger than any other girl, so the problems to find the right shoes started so early, I had to buy shoes that are designed for an older lady. Later, I was so limited to certain models, colors, and designs…

I enjoy buying shoes….it is a pleasure of mine to search for new shoes.. mom says that I’m a shoe collector ..:D…I buy them…try them…find them un-comfortable…then keep them for a while…..then give them to charity….actually while I’m purchasing them…I know what life cycle they’ll have with me…:D

Having the same color of shoes, same design, is a case that I find myself in very often…I just can’t resist buying a shoe that fits my foot…since it is rare to happen. once I found these shoes that are bigger than my foot, my happiness was un-describable, I was extremely thrilled...poor me:P….

Sometimes I thank God that I have these big feet, I guess it is un-optional way to save money…and stop my un-controllable addiction….:D….lel lah fe khalqehi sho2oon….

If you can’t say sorry…I can’t tolerate you…!!

Yes, that’s right, it is important for me to know that you can say sorry, it will make no difference to you to admit your fault….there is nothing to be shame of, we r all human being, it is in our nature that we make mistakes, and there is no problem with that, the real problem is when we wont admit that we are mistaken.

Is it that hard?? Haven’t you ever thought that it is the opposite’s right to get an apology when one of his/her rights is violated?? Do you think it is a sign of weakness when you say sorry?? Do u believe that only weak ppl say sorry….no dear…FYI…only dare people say sorry…it is needs a great guts to admit your mistake…and without taking this step…ur problem will always stand in your face….

I don’t mind saying sorry…it is a great relief.. it is the magical word that can heal the wounds we may cause un-intentionally to ppl we love… and believe me, it is a master key to solve problems, especially if it is used in the right way….at the right time, with the right person….

For those who can’t say sorry…the only way is not to make any mistake…if u can do that…I guess you can remove the word SORRY from your dictionary…..other else…I can’t tolerate dealing with you…!!

Never expected that from u Monk….

I’m a good watcher for monk, I love this series, how the story starts, so vague…with few details, and woops…he finds the answer for the mystery. But that’s not all about Monk. I kind like him, sure not for the obsessions he has, he has something.. And strangely, I can’t specify it… I just can’t.

Monk has this phobia, (if I can call it like that) among many other, he hates any one to touch him, he cleans his hands if had to shake hands with others, he can’t stand any kind of dirt, not to mention he has his way in cleaning, and marinating hygiene.

Yesterday, I was watching this episode, something I never had expected, Monk is holding a kid in his arms, playing with him, shaking hands….doing this and doing that… so I was like…waw…even u monk…and that was not all…he wanted to raise up that kid ….for ever …I guess I never saw that coming…

I said before I love kids, they r sweet little angels walking on earth (not all of them sure), I feel thrilled when I hear their voices and laughs; I like nagging kids while driving, lol…I do it a lot…I like their un- understood words, their trails for walking, then falling at the floor…their way of eating, sleeping, running, painting, even having fights, their little fingers and toes, their sweet hand grab, their freshening hair smell….in brief…I like every thing about kids….

I know it is hard to raise a kid, but I guess the feeling that he/she creates inside parents worth the effort….Monk I can’t blame u …kids r absolutely irresistible….

I had a dream!!

Yesterday I had a weird dream, and this is not the point, since I have weird dreams all the time, and I ask for the explanation of it all the time…but the weird thing is that I dreamed that I was in a situation, and I was thinking about blogging about it…I guess blogging is part of my life right now…since it is clearly part of my dreams..:D

DAD.....thank U

When it comes to thanking you dad, I think of million of things I can thank u for, your care, continues concern, unlimited giving….and the list can go on and on…
Today, I’m thanking u for raising me with good manner. Thanks cause u planted in me loving others, helping them whenever it is possible. U were a great example for me, no one ever complained from u, since u never hurt any one.

Going in different situations in life made me realized that ur way in raising us taught us how to stick to the right side, fight for our believes and ideas, never commit a mistake, even if every one is doing it.

Dad…thanks for ur good genes…. (I forgive u for the bad ones), I’m proud of my ability to stay calm and never lose a temper, I enjoy that I’m a great believer in destiny, which most of ppl claim they believe in it, but once they r truly tested…they worthily fail.

I’ll always appreciate giving me the right to make decisions in my life, giving me freedom after showing me the right way….in a world were a female is to obey rules…and take orders…

Thanks dad for bearing me, my unfinished requests, my slips and mistakes….thanks for being such a great tauter …and above all…THANKS FOR BEING MY DAD. LOVE U DAD


P.S. I wrote this while I was so upset of my dad, but still I can’t stop admiring him.
another P.S. i wrote this blog cuz i'm proud of dad, not myself(even though i'm)

Finally…she is in love…but….

She is new in her work, still checking the people around. She’ll never forget that day, sitting in her manager’s office and here he passes. He was the one she was dreaming about all the time, she never felt like that toward any one, all the guys she met were kids to her, but his one…he is the man of her dreams….

She never believed in love from 1st sight, she thought people talking about that are silly and so shallow….how do they think?? Love is not about how u look, it is much more than that…so how could she?? And she is the one laughing at others’ stories…..now she is sure…feelings are never controlled…..

“Waaw…he entered the office, defiantly he is not a model, he is not pretty, but he sure knows how to make her heart illogically jumps, she is plashing, she can even feels the heat in her face…her whole body…and the worst thing.. she can’t hide this obvious spark in her eyes…..he says hi, welcomes her in the company…asks her typical questions…and she answers with this weak…trembling voice…..she knew at that time she is in love…..

Her manager: “Mr. M, u have gained weight!!”
Her love: “yah man….it is marriage (bragging) ..u know…newly wed”……WAW….what a shock…it took her a while that is not short to get back from far away thinking…..her hopes went away with the winds….

Days passe by…..they are getting good friends, and even though she does not agree with very essential thoughts he holds… she enjoys talking to him, spending time with him, her happiness can’t be measured when he shows interest in her, she even does her best to get his attention…and gets him like her even more.

There was no way to hide her feelings; her big, un-erasable smile always exposed her … her plashed face, and the way she fixes her look, perfume, and make up before going to him…were so clear, a blind can see them….she is entirely attracted to him……

Deep inside…she knew she does not have the right to love him, it is a love from one side, even if it was from both sides…it is not her right….nor his…he has a family now…..

Going through upsides- downsides ….she lived her life, struggling the inner feeling of guilt…she has to be able to control her feelings, she is a strong person, never been weak…….but she never could….she decided to control her acts…..

Three years later, she left her job, a job that one factor to stay in, is to keep close to him, see him every day and hear his voice…she even hated to wear green, cause when she does, she doesn’t see him that day….she decided not to wear green….

She is away now….but still compares each guy with him, has this fantasy dreams about dancing with him and being held in his arms. Her heart still starts to beat in a bloodcurdling way when she sees his name calling her on mobile….she still wants to call him for the silliest reason…. And then she thanks God she was able to hold herself and never call….

Her prayers are: “Please God, give me strength, and let me get over this….Please God…give me strength to do the right thing…and never hurt any one…including myself”…..

Time passes by….

Yesterday I went to see my best friend, we have been friends for more than 11 years, being class mates was the beginning, then we traveled together, and relation got stronger cause as they say u get to know the reality of person when u travel with him/her. Thanks to Allah we still best friends, and I know that I can count on her each time I need to.

Life gets us busy, and every one gets occupied with his personal manners. Because of that, time passes and u don’t get the chance to meet a friend and hang together, u just get satisfied with the phone, email and sms…

My best friend got married 1.5 year ago, now she has this lovely girl…she is so cute. .ma sha2 allah ( I love kids by the way)…it has been a while since I saw her last time, and u know kids, they grow up very fast, so a week will make a big difference. So.. I saw her yesterday…u know when I saw her mother carrying her in coat ….. I was like…: “waw…time passes by…we just loose the sense of time…. I still have the feeling that we r kids playing in school yard…waw…time passes in an eye blink….”

After one month, it will be my 27th birthday; it is the time where I evaluate my whole year, what I have done so far, what goals I have achieved, what new things I have learned, and what plans I have for future. I have never thought that my 27th birthday will come while I’m still confused and lacking settlement in life…. I’m really confused…and enormous thoughts r flying in my head…I guess I have one month to make up my mind about many things….

I was looking for a pic to this blog…I found a freezed clock…I guess deep inside ourselves we wish to freeze time…or even to control it…. :D